The Meaning, Idea and Importance of Chivalry in the Present Scenario

Image Source: What Type of Chivalry is Important to You | Glamour 

In the Middle Ages, the knights used to go on adventures, slaying dragons, exploring places, winning titles, all in the name of their kings. While these noble men fought in the wars, the ladies used to wait inside the castles for their safe arrival. These ladies used to dress themselves in the finest silks and satins, their hair always done, their lips the colour of ruby, their faces all dented and painted. These women used to spend their time doing the household chores, and by engaging themselves in hobbies like, stitching clothes, painting, and gardening. Simultaneously, they spent their time waiting for the arrival of their ‘heroes,’ praying for their safety, and for the goodwill of their own kingdom. The role of these women was confined to look beautiful, maintain the house, and wait for the knights, so that when they come back, get on their knees, and present before them the ‘war trophies,’ they would accept these tokens gracefully, displaying utmost admiration and respect.

The woman in the contemporary time, however, wants to go out. She is her own knight. She wants to slay the dragons too. She wants appreciation too, and she definitely cannot confine herself to the four walls of her house. In such a scenario, the question arises, ‘Why do women expect chivalry from men?’ If the ideals of feminism propagate equality between the two sexes in all the spheres of life, why do women expect men to get down on their knees and maintain a chivalrous code of conduct in front of them? In this article, I have tried to explore the meaning of Chivalry in the present time, and have also tried to assert the need for it in the contemporary masculine/feminine dynamic.

Chivalry is basically an informal code of conduct that was developed between 1170 and 1220 and reflected on the medieval institution of knighthood. These codes provided a peep into the characters and lives of gentlewomen and gentlemen (mainly knights) during the Medieval Age, and were basically popularized by Geoffrey of Monmouth who in his famous work, Historia Regum Britanniae popularized the legend of King Arthur. The term ‘chivalry’ is derived from the French word, chevalerie which roughly translates to ‘horse soldiery.’ The knights were basically men of high ranks who were equipped with military training, swordsmanship, and high ideals. These men reflected a kind of devotion to women and to honour. They were free of vices, displayed heroic courage whenever the situation demanded, and as noted by Mills and Gautier, the knights always abided by virtues like loyalty, forbearance, liberality, hardihood, and honour. Among all the familiar aspects of chivalry, the most notable is the duties of knights towards women which often contained what is generally known as their display of ‘courtly love.’The knights displayed utmost gentleness and graciousness to all women.

The traditional concept of chivalry associated with knighthood began to fade away during the Tudor Rule till Queen Elizabeth I finally put an end to it by making it exclusively the preserve of the monarch. From the early 19th century onwards, the term ‘chivalry’ was replaced by ‘gallantry’ which reflected on the proper behaviour adopted by men towards women. In the 19th century, Kenelm Henry Digby in his work, “The Broad-Stone of Honour” tried to revive the concept of chivalry by introducing a definition of it which is as follows:

Chivalry is only a name for that general spirit or state of mind which disposes men of heroic actions, and keeps them conversant with all that is beautiful and sublime in the intellectual and moral world.

After the catastrophe of the First World War, the idea of chivalry came to be seen as an outdated code of conduct adopted by men to ‘save’ women. This was partly due to the fact that the ‘dress sword’ lost its position as a part of gentleman’s wardrobe, and modern military clothing came into its place. The women too began to challenge it in the name of gender equality since the masculine virtues associated with this concept were idealized where as women were looked upon as damsels in distress waiting for man to rescue them. It should also be noted that during the political movement of Suffragette, the traditional concept of chivalry was judged for its responsibility only towards women and not fellow men, and this came to be regarded as a loophole in this code of conduct. Doug Philips in “The Birkenhead Drill” notes that:

The idea of men were to act as differentially on behalf of women and children, though an ancient principle, was already under attack by 1911 from militant suffragettes intent on leveling the political playing field by removing from the public mindset that women were a ‘weaker sex’ in need of saying.

To add to the above assertions, Urban Dictionary notes that, the image of an honourable knight saving a fair maiden from ‘dragon’ is not more than “a sheer fantasy” that “seems to stem from the Victorian era. The Victorians in the midst of the Industrial Revolution looked at the Middle Ages through rose-coloured glasses as an idyllic place of pre-industrial innocence, projecting their own ideals of men and women onto the knight and the damsel in distress.”

In the contemporary time, the women walk shoulder to shoulder with men. They do not wear silks and satins everyday and definitely do not confine themselves to performing the household chores. We live in such an era where both of the sexes, the male as well as the female have confused themselves to such an extent that it has become difficult for both of them to behave properly around each other. Men have become passive and women have become aggressive in their discourse with the opposite sex. Thanks to the Internet, where a majority of people limit their discussion on Feminism to clothes, PMS, office leaves, reservation, splitting of restaurant bills, etcetera, instead of focusing on the real issues, the term has become synonymous to ‘male-bashing.’ Men and women on Social Media applications like Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram refuse to understand each other’s feelings and keep on challenging each other’s views on such superficial topics. As a result, ideas like ‘lady-like’ attitude that is expected from the females, and chivalrous attitude that is expected from the males are constantly challenged and have been declared ‘dead.’

It should be realized that these ideas are very important in the present scenario if both the sexes hope to exist with each other in mutual harmony. It is not implied that chivalry should be expected from men in the classic sense of the word. Instead, a chivalrous man in the contemporary time should be looked upon as basically a gentleman, that is, a man who would let a woman have her own opinion, who would lend an ear to her voice, and who would display affection towards her.

In the Middle Ages, a knight was expected to open the tavern door for his lady; one can easily picture a knight kneeling before a maiden and kissing her hand. Although such actions are not required to be performed in the present scenario yet their execution still holds a lot of significance. They contain a sort of romanticism in them, and if a man performs them, they very well demonstrate his affection and admiration towards his woman. These chivalric actions possess a classic touch and so, they are still considered the best way for a man to articulate his genuine feelings in front of his lady. It is this reason that the Cambridge Dictionary provides its definition of chivalry as, “very polite, honest, and kind behaviour especially by men towards women.”

Since the knights were men of high ranks possessing a noble birth, the display of polite behaviour by the masculine towards the feminine reflects on his good upbringing. Such a behaviour from men can never be condemned by women and the latter will not but respond in a ‘lady-like’ manner.

To conclude my article, I would like to say that since the societal norms are dynamic in nature, a chivalrous man in the present scenario should be taken as a gentleman, that is, a well-mannered, charming man. And we need men to adopt this attitude rather than a passive-aggressive one as then only a fruitful relationship between the masculine and the feminine can be formulated.

***